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Top Ten Best Super Bowl 50 Ads

So raise your hand if you think this year’s presentation of the greatest gridiron epic saga ever sold was an absolute borefest?

Normally this wouldn’t be a problem as the Super Bowl in recent years has been about as exciting as the Pro Bowl (maybe the NFL should switch it back so they play the Pro Bowl AFTER the Super Bowl). However, this year the commercials seemed like total duds, and did not make sitting through the excrutiating 3 hours just to see who would show up any better.

Even so, here is our annual list of the top ten ads that we thought stood out among the rest.

10. Audi:  “Commander”

This was a sentimental tear jerker as it invoked memories of a time when we were all racing towards the moon, and of course, the ultimate Starman himself, David Bowie.

9. Jeep “4x4ever” and “Portaits”

 

So we have a tie (and you know how we love ties here at GeekGirl World) between the two Jeep commercials celebrating 75 years of this rugged vehicle that has accompanied us into victory during war time, and led us into many adventures.

8. Pokemon #Pokemon20

Wow. Pokemon turns 20 this year! Can you believe it? Neither could I, but you better catch ’em all!

 7. Amazon Echo #BaldwinBowl

There aint no party like a Baldwin party because Baldwin parties have Missy Elliott dropping her new single Pep Rally! And Dan Marino and Alec Baldwin doing “Who’s better/Who’s best.”

6. Advocados from Mexico #AvosInSpace

Advocados in space. That is it, that is all. Plus Scott Baio, but who’s counting that?

5. Taco Bell “Bigger than…”

One word: Quesalupa. Just let that marinate in your brain because Taco Bell has invented a new reason to buy some Pepto-Bismol. Of course, I will be eating these every day until they come up with their next invention. Oh…and then there’s George Takei!

4. Skittles “Portait” with Steven Tyler

Rock the Rainbow. Taste the Rainbow. When you have Steven Tyler, what better way to do both?! Guess what? You can bid on the actual Skittles portrait here with proceeds going to Janie’s Fund.

3. Snickers “Marilyn”

Snickers exposing an age old truth; that there was no good reason to film Marilyn on that subway grate. Hell, I would have been crankier than Willem Dafoe too!

2. Budweiser #GiveADamn

Helen Mirren letting us all know why she is the Queen of Everything, and how one should look at 70! Also, #GiveADamn, because drunk driving is for complete wastes of space, and Helen Mirren said so!

1. Doritos “Ultrasound”

As a person who has had a baby and loves Doritos, all I can say is that this commercial is scary and could possibly happen! Because, I couldn’t imagine anyone not liking Doritos. Even unborn children!

Let us know if your favorite made the cut! And no, Puppy Monkey Baby is not on this list, because it was just creepy as fuck!

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Clueless Motorist: Chrysler Hell

I’m really upset that I own a Chrysler vehicle, but probably not for the reason you’d expect.

In case you haven’t heard by now, Fiat Chrysler is recalling MILLIONS UPON MILLIONS of vehicles, including the Dodge Ram and pretty much every Jeep Grand Cherokee ever made. Seriously.

The main issue with these vehicles being that well, they just suck. Rams are losing control because of shitty suspension, Grand Cherokee’s are spontaneously combusting upon rear-end impact, cats and dogs are living together, Madonna is still making music… it’s a mess.

I’m sure that the executives over at Fiat are sobbing uncontrollably in their over-sized Jacuzzi bathtubs in their ridiculously ornate and gorgeous Italian mansions right now. They inherited one hell of a problem when they bought out Chrysler, and now they are now forced to pay up to $105M in penalties to the NHTSA (That’s the National Highway Traffic Safety Administration).

But what is a huge financial problem for Fiat is an even bigger problem for consumers, who unknowingly may be driving around ticking time bombs. If you do own a Chrysler-made vehicle then it definitely is essential that you check to see if your vehicle is on the recall list.

Obviously Fiat Chrysler will be fixing these vehicles at no charge, but there’s also another fantastic option available that will help you get rid of your Chrysler death trap once and for all: they will buy your car back from you at current market value, plus give you 10% more on top of that. This is only for select vehicles, but STILL, that is awesome!

Well, awesome for everyone except people like me who own a Chrysler vehicle not on the recall list.

I absolutely adore my 2004 Chrysler Sebring convertible, which my parents bought me some years ago for college (yeah yeah, I was spoiled). I have heated seats, leather, and the absolute luxury of my long, long hair getting endlessly tangled in the wind.

Me trying to brush my hair after cruising top down without a hair tie #struggle

But I also live in Massachusetts, and our weather severely limits its use. Plus, I have a Mustang as well (this one I bought all by myself, I thank you) and I really need something with some AWD power, as our winters are no joke.

So, even though I love Serena (I named her, get over it), shes gots to go.

But how the hell can I EVER hope to sell my car when Chrysler’s already tarnished reputation is heading down to previously uncharted depths of hell?

Soon trying to sell a Chrysler (and actually profiting) is going to be as impossible as selling Nickleback’s new album. It’s going to be that bad.

All I can do at this point is pray that some catastrophic mistake is finally noticed in Sebring convertibles of the same year as mine, leading Fiat Chrysler to buy it right from me.

This will be the best case scenario, as I’m a little too busy (and lazy) to put the car up on the market and deal with bogus Craigslist scammers, trolls, and morons. No, I’m not going to accept your ridiculously vast collection of bald, naked Barbie dolls as a trade in. Yeesh.

Sigh. Thanks Chrysler… your suckery will not be forgotten, I assure you.

Do you own a Chrysler vehicle? Let me know your thoughts on the recall in the comments!

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Clueless Motorist: How to Fix Minor Scratches!

 

I was backing out of my garage one morning in a sleepy haze when suddenly I heard the distinct sound of scratching paint. I let the bagel that had been dangling from my mouth drop to my lap and I let out a slew of expletives too vile to list.

I put the car into park, got out (now suddenly wide awake) and confirmed my fear: I had scraped the right side of my car on the innards of the garage.

Luckily I didn’t bend or dent the frame, but I was left with a scuff and a nice sliver taken out of the paint. Oh, and some extremely annoying white residue.

But still, my car is my child! My baby! Any blemish upon my vehicle is a blemish upon my very soul. I was to be doomed to live a half-life of torment knowing that I allowed such a stupid mistake to ruin my baby.

Okay, well maybe that’s taking it a little too far, but you get the idea: I was upset!

unnamed

So I took her to the local auto body shop to get an estimate, where they told me it would be over $700 dollars to fix.

My bumper is road rashed from all my driving so I planned on getting it repainted eventually… but over $700? Are you kidding? For that price I could buy an entire new bumper, or even an awesome new Kate Spade bag (decisions!).

The silver lining here was that they informed me that most of the white residue could actually come off, meaning that my side fender (which was also scratched where it connects to the bumper) wouldn’t have to be repainted at all. And if they could easily get that off, then why can’t I?

I decided to take some time out and try to fix the damage, experimenting a little with different products and methods. Eventually I found a nice little routine that worked, and for a DIY job it actually turned out pretty well!

So, without further adieu, here are my steps for getting some minor scratches and blemishes off your precious ride:

1. Prep the area. Clean the area that you are trying to fix as best as you can, that way you can focus on the scratches without surface dirt getting in the way.  Rise the area first and then lather it with car wash solution (If you don’t have car wash solution on hand, simply just mix some soap and water together). Use a sponge to get all the dirt out of the area, rinse it, and then dry it off with a microfiber towel (or just a regular towel, but I highly suggest the former).

2. Bring out the nail polish remover!  If you’ve grazed something (or something grazed you) it’s usually going to be the color of whatever that object was that made contact with your vehicle (in my case, the white residue on my car was due to the fact that I grazed a white garage). That residue unfortunately can be hard to get off, even with a normal wash.

For this you’re going to want to go into your manicure kit and bring out the nail polish remover. Nail polish remover isn’t just for removing stubborn nail art, it’s also a perfect tool for getting  hard-to-remove residue off of your vehicle.

Apply the nail polish remover to a clean rag, and slowly (but with some pressure) wipe the affected area in a circular motion. If you’re lucky, you should see the residue disappear.  But if you have nail polish on like I did, yeah… that’s also going to disappear.

3. Wash down the area again: You don’t want the nail polish remover to stay on your paint, as it can actually erode it. As soon as you are done, QUICKLY wash down the area again with soap and water to get the remainder of the nail polish remover off.

4. Time for a wax! No, ladies, not for you. Car wax does a wonderful job of getting rid of blemishes that your car has, such as light scratches and annoying circular patterns. It fills in the scratches and not only evens the paint out, but protects it. If waxing your car isn’t something you are already doing, then I highly recommend making it a habit. Time consuming? Yes, but you’ll see wonderful results.

5. 3M scratch remover. Available at auto stores pretty much everywhere, 3M scratch remover fills in the scratches and bonds to your paint. Put some on a rag and firmly rub into the affected area until its dry. You may have to do this a few more times before you see the results you want, depending on the extent of the damage.

6. See the results!

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As you can see from my car, all that ugly white residue has disappeared. All that’s left unfortunately is a deep scratch that I can’t really fix and a random scuff.

I will still be getting my front bumper professional fixed and repainted, but at least for the mean time the damage is less noticeable.

Oh, and if you noticed that the headlights look different, good eye! I installed my blackout headlight covers while I was prepping the car.

Hopefully this method will work for all you poor folks out there with blemishes on your own babies! Have any more tips on fixing scratches at home? I’d love to hear your suggestions in the comments! 

 

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The Sad History Behind the DeLorean

 

The DeLorean DMC-12 became an instant icon in Hollywood automotive history when Back to the Future was released exactly 30 years ago today on July 3, 1985.

And while most people know of the DeLorean thanks to the film, many don’t realize that underneath the flashing lights, extensive wiring, and that super awesome flux capacitor lay a production car that was anything but normal.

The DeLorean DMC-12 was truly one-of-a-kind, and it was the only vehicle ever produced by the DeLorean company.

But as iconic as the car was, it was doomed to have a not-so-Hollywood ending.

The man behind the machine

The DeLorean can be credited back to one man, and one man alone: John DeLorean.

DeLorean was born in the automotive capitol of the world, Detroit, in 1925. In the 1950s he began working as an engineer for the Packard Motor Company, later moving to General Motors (GM), where he developed the Pontiac GTO – a vehicle often described as the first “muscle car.”

He rose quickly through the corporate ranks at GM, eventually becoming the youngest general manager of the Pontiac division.  In only a few years time he would become the youngest head of Chevrolet in history.

Due to his success with GM, DeLorean was naturally well known and respected in the automotive industry. He lived a lavish lifestyle (as one would expect from a man of his caliber) but that lifestyle would eventually lead to his fall from grace.

Rise of the DeLorean DMC-12

DeLorean resigned from GM in 1973 and formed his eponymous company.

His goal was to create his dream sports car, a dream he could not accomplish whilst being inhibited by GM’s ideologies and goals.

Delorean DMC-12

This dream also couldn’t be completed without a considerable amount of money. In all, $175 million was required to get the project into motion. But with the financial help of the British government, as well as celebrities such as Johnny Carson and Sammy Davis Jr. pitching in, he was able to get the project off the ground.

The first prototype DeLorean DMC-12 was completed by American automotive chief engineer William T. Collins (who was formerly chief engineer at Pontiac), but it would be a long and grueling process before the DeLorean was to be set into mass production.

Many of the original plans for the car were deemed unsuitable, and it eventually underwent a complete re-engineering, which Colin Chapman (founder and owner of Lotus) oversaw.

DeLorean DMC-12 Head on photo with doors open ...

Official production of the DMC-12 began in 1981 in DeLorean’s factory in Dunmurry, Ireland.

The DMC-12 was fitted with a PRV (Peugeot-Renault-Volvo) fuel injected V6. Its speedometer maxed out at 85 MPH (which Back to the Future fans may find especially interesting, as the DeLorean time machine needed to hit 88 MPH in order to travel through time).

Its gull-wing doors, unpainted stainless-steel body panels, and rear-mounted engine were definitely not common within the automotive industry, and many considered the car highly unusual.

But if the DeLorean’s appearance didn’t scare potential buyers away, its price sure did. It carried a then-hefty price tag of $25,000.

…& the fall

The financial burden that the DMC-12 took on the DeLorean company eventually became too large for production to continue.

On October 19, 1982, the British government announced the plant would be shuttered.

The burden had fallen hard on John DeLorean as well, who was arrested for drug-trafficking in Los Angeles on that very same day.

DeLorean had been approached by a former drug smuggler turned federal informant several months before his arrest, and the two men engaged in a series of discussions regarding a deal involving cocaine smuggling and money laundering. The hope was that the money from the drug smuggling would save DeLorean’s business.

His trial was highly publicized, and all the while DeLorean maintained that he had been set up by the government. A jury eventually acquitted him in August 1984, but by then the DeLorean motor company was all but a memory.

DeLorean died at age 80 from a stroke on March 19, 2005.

& the rise again?

The DeLorean DMC-12 regained public interest after being showcased in Back to the Future, one year after DeLorean’s acquittal.

It quickly became a collector’s item, and a rare one at that: only about 9000 DMC-12’s were ever produced.

So, perhaps the story did in a strange way have a happy ending. DeLorean may not have created a prestigious car company, but he did create a car that will remain legendary perhaps forever.

Did that outweigh his pain and suffering? Most likely not… but at least the man will always remain a legend and a success in the eyes of Back to the Future fans everywhere.

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Clueless Motorist: The Cold Hard Truth About Cold Air Intakes

I equate having to listen to people talk about their engines to being Charlie Brown in class: I know they’re spitting out words, but it’s just utter nonsense to me. And rather than make an effort to understand, I usually just get sucked into my smartphone and play video games (Clash of Clans, baby!) until it’s all over.

But on those rare occasions that I do decide to tune in to their conversations about…tuning… I usually just hear a bunch of words I’ve never heard before and copious references to new “cold air intakes”.

What the fuck is a cold air intake, and more importantly, why should we all care?

From what I’ve gathered over the years, a CAI is something that not only makes your car faster and run smoother, but also adds a little yellow smiley sticker to your ego that says “good job!”

ImageLet’s consult our educational overlord, Wikipedia, in order to get some answers here.

A cold air intake is an aftermarket assembly of parts used to bring relatively cool air into a car’s internal-combustion engine.

Most vehicles manufactured since the mid-1970s have thermostatic air intake systems that regulate the temperature of the air entering the engine’s intake tract, providing warm air when the engine is cold and cold air when the engine is warm to maximize performance, efficiency, and fuel economy. Aftermarket cold air intake systems are marketed with claims of increased engine efficiency and performance. The putative principle behind a cold air intake is that cooler air has a higher density, thus containing more oxygen per volume unit than warmer air.

The kicker in this explanation is the fact that they used the word “claims”. With a decent cold air intake and tuner kit (which is used to calibrate your engine to your desired specifications) being around $700 for my car (A 2010 Ford Mustang), I’m not taking any chances on claims.

It either works or it doesn’t, annnnnnd, according to the video below…

…it really doesn’t.

So why the hell are people spending good money to alter their engines for something that essentially has very little gain?

Part of the reason may be because a cold air intake will tend to make the engine louder, which some consider a coveted trait in their vehicles.

Or it might just be the flawed rule of mathematics: loud engine + hot person = one smoking hot date.

But if I had to guess, the real reason for the popularity surrounding the CAI is most likely due to the chain effect. You all know what I’m talking about. If everyone tells you that the iPhone is the best phone ever (a “fact” I will always argue), then next time you go shopping for a phone, you buy an iPhone. Why argue with the general consensus?

Whatever the cause, just don’t allow yourself to get suckered into purchasing something for your car you really won’t need. Do your research first on your specific make and model and consult an expert.

And the next time people around you are blabbering about cold air intakes, blind them with your new found science! You might just save someone quite a few bucks down the road.

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Fan Film Friday covers Centerstar’s Mad Max short

Paying homage to George Miller‘s movie franchise and inspired by Avalanche Studios video game, James Cawley and Centerstar Marketing have created an intense Mad Max-inspired fan film, and we we’re not mad at all about reviewing it!

Watch their short here.

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Top Ten Best Super Bowl XLIX Ads

Now that the the big game is over, let’s discuss the real reason for watching Super Bowl XLIX. The commercials! Here is our list counting down from 10 to 1 of the best ads to air during the game. So sit back, relax, and relive Super Bowl Sunday through these ads!

10. Tie between the Walter White and Lindsay Lohan “Sorta Isn’t You” ads.

While Lindsay Lohan was being a good sport and poking fun at her own image of being a bad driver, we got to see Walter White return to us in his prime to dole out prescriptions…sorta…

9. Toyota Camry “How Great I Am” Featuring Amy Purdy and Muhammad Ali.

The voice-over of the “Greatest of All Time” narrates this spot featuring Paralympic Champion Amy Purdy as she shows us how unstoppable she can be despite having a disability.

8. Chevy “What would you do if your TV went out right before the Super Bowl?”

So, Chevy had approximately 115 million people (including this author) in an utter state of panic with their Super Bowl ad. Luckily, it was a hoax to promote their 4G LTE Wi-Fi equipped Colorado..but yea..don’t do that to us again!

7. Snickers “The Brady Bunch”.

Snickers went full on nostaligia with their ad that reminded us of the age old adage that it’s ALWAYS about Marsha and NEVER about Jan!

6. Budweiser “Best Buds”.

If anyone knows how to pull on those feels, it’s Budweiser. Regardless of whether their beer tastes any good or not. Puppies and Clydesdales! Their marketing department knows their stuff!

5. Tie Between Microsoft’s “Braylon O’Neill” and “Estella’s Brilliant Bus” Commercials.

Both these commercials had empowering messages of how technology is being used to make our lives better. Certain to jerk a tear from even the driest eye.

4. Dodge “Wisdom”.

Sharing with us 100 years worth of wisdom, these seniors remind us of how young they truly are. You are never to old to put the pedal to the metal!

3. Nationwide Insurance “Invisible Mindy Kaling”.

Mindy is every woman who has ever felt invisible in this world…and who has also wanted to kiss Matt Damon. At least we can settle for a selfie!

2. Mophie “All Powerless”.

So when the end of days comes, we know it’s just that God forgot to charge his phone. Also, God has a nice afro!

1. Always “Like A Girl”.

If there was one commercial that really captured what it means to be a girl, it was this one. Us girls don’t think of being female as a deficit. We ALWAYS play full out and beyond, just as any guy would!

There you have it. Our Top Ten with a few extra. If you agree or disagree, or if you have your own list, feel free to discuss in the comments!

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Ron Burgundy and… Dodge?

I don’t know how to put this… but the Dodge Durango is kind of a big deal.

That’s at least according to Dodge’s newest spokesperson: Ron Burgundy.

In a clever (and, may we add, absolutely hilarious) dual advertising campaign, Dodge has joined forces with Paramount Pictures in a series of new short commercials aimed at advertising both Dodge’s remodeled SUV and Paramount’s new film, Anchorman 2: The Legend Continues.

In the advertisements, Burgundy (portrayed by Will Ferrell) struggles with the aspect of “MPG”, shoos away dancers who got a little too close to his ride, verbally abuses a horse, and educates the masses into just how much gum can fit in the Durango’s glove box. Spoiler Alert! It’s 70.

Check out just a few of the advertisements!

You can watch even more on youtube here.

What was your favorite advertisement? let us know in the comments below!

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If Darth Vader Drove A Car…

west-coast-customs-vader-ride-02If the Sith Lord, Darth Vader, drove a car, this would be it! In the latest edition of Velocity Channel’s Inside West Coast Customs, huge Star Wars fan Ryan Friedlinghaus, was tapped by Lucasfilm & ILM to create a Star Wars themed car. After an initial design meeting with top ILM designers, it was decided that West Coast Customs would build a car that Darth Vader would want to drive. The result was this tricked out Volkswagon Passat “Vader Car” equipped with red glowing lights and black matte trim over a black glossy finish.

west-coast-customs-vader-ride-03

“This was one of those ones that was obviously very personal to me. I mean, words can’t express how excited I was to build this car, and to get the reaction that I got today, I think it hit home. We didn’t overdo it where, I was worried, you know, if do we too much its gonna just look cheesy, it’s not gonna represent the brand the way we want to represent it. This car you can actually get in and drive it. People will look at it and say ‘Wow, that’s and awesome car.'” -Ryan Friedlinghaus

west-coast-customs-vader-ride-04

The car will be on display in Orlando at Star Wars Celebration VI from August 23rd-26th and you can win tickets to go see it. All you have to do is visit either the West Coast Customs or Star War Celebration VI websites to enter.

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Is Your Fantasy Football Team Ready For Some Football?

nfl-fantasy-logo-235x235The season officially starts tonight, so how many of you think you are actually ready to be competitive in your leagues? If you are a serious player, you’ve already been doing your research, and have probably had your line-up set since last week. Here are five tips to make sure that you get off to the right start with your team this season and get into the playoffs.

1. Always check game time status.
Some players may be questionable and a game time decision. You always want to check these players at least ten to fifteen minutes before game time to be sure if they are starting or not. You could bench a player due to questionable status for injuries, and then all of the sudden, he is starting, and that could cost you major points. Or the other side to this is that you have a guy in that you know always plays injured, but this week the coach is saying no, and he’s on the sidelines while you get a big fat zero next to his name on your roster. Always check no matter what.

2. Have enough running backs and wide receivers.
In most leagues, these are the guys that are the workhorses, and make the most points for the fantasy team. You should always stack your team with running backs, wide receivers, and flex players to maximize on your point potential. Keep a look out for guys that fly under the radar through the season, but stay consistent in point averages. Sleepers can be great pickups on the waiver wire, or free agency when you need to cover bye weeks. They can also be good trade material or replacements if you find yourself in a bind due to injuries.

3. Always have a backup quarterback, but never have more than two QBs on your roster.
It’s good to get your backup QB early in the season, or even during your draft, because if your league isn’t too deep, you may be stuck with someone who will put the rest of your roster in jeopardy. There aren’t many elite QB out there. You want to have at least a starting QB who is consistent, and then someone who can replace your starter if he goes out in the first game like Tom Brady did in 2009. Also, you don’t want to wait around for your QB bye week to pick up someone. Better to have him sitting on your bench to go in during the bye, and drop him after, than scrambling to find someone who will maintain your winning average. Having more than 2 QBs is a waste of valuable roster space, though. They don’t make good trade material at all unless an elite QB like Tom Brady goes out for the season in the first game.

4. A kicker is a kicker is a kicker.
The kicker position is the easiest position to fill in fantasy football, because kickers are always consistent and are going to get their points. If they aren’t, then they aren’t playing. No team is going to keep a kicker who consistently misses. It’s just not done. Ever. If your kicker is scoring less than 3 points a week, time to get a new kicker and there are always plenty out there to get. Never have more than one kicker on your roster. During the bye you can drop your kicker, pick up a new one, and possibly finish out the season with the new kicker no problem because…well…it’s a kicker!

5. Enjoy the game!
Don’t forget that this is football, and it is meant to be intense, exciting, and fun! Watch the games, watch your league match, chat up with your friends about the plays, and above all else don’t let people tell you that NFL stands for the No Fun League!

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