Posted on Leave a comment

Giant Minion Wreaks Havoc in Ireland, Attacks Drivers!

The Minions from Despicable Me have begun their assault on humanity, and they’re doing it on a HUGE scale.

A giant Minion towering at over 40 ft tall wreaked Havoc in Dublin, Ireland yesterday by situating himself in the middle of a congested Dublin street, creating a traffic jam that lasted nearly 3 hours.

The Minion, who authorities later identified as Kevin, was hysterically laughing and shooting a fart blaster gun in the the direction of incoming vehicles, filling unsuspecting victims vehicles with pure putrid disgustingness.  Victims described the scent as “a mix of beans, Ron Jeremy’s ass, and week old Chipotle.”

Authorities attempted to calm down the giant Minion and escort him off of the road, but this was a task that proved difficult, as the officers and civilians on the scene were not fluent in Minionese, the native tongue of the Minions.

https://twitter.com/someecards/status/628535032630652928/photo/1

They were eventually able to get the Minion to safety and open back up the roadways for motorists by bribing the Minion with a truckload full of fresh bananas.

Irish authorities at this time are unsure why the minion was in the middle of the road, but they suspect that the yellow fellow has ties to the Provisional Irish Republican Army. It is believed that the giant Minion was being manipulated and used simply as a political ploy, as the IRA has been known to pull off elaborate stunts in order to bring awareness to their fight against Northern Ireland.

The IRA was most recently involved in a stunt which included a giant Twilight Sparkle (from My Little Pony). The angry pony stomped fields outside of Belfast and left glittery dung throughout the entire Northern Ireland region.

The minion was held in custody briefly but was later released. Surprisingly, no charges are to be filed, but the Minion may have to pay a fine and reimburse authorities for the cost of nearly 2,000 bananas.

Okay, you know that’s all bullshit. Here’s the real story:

A 40 ft tall inflatable Minion broke free of its restraints in a fair outside of Dublin due to the wind, got stuck in the middle of the road, effectively halting traffic, and was soon deflated and removed with no injuries or accidents reported.

https://twitter.com/TODAYshow/status/628337029575671808/photo/1

I still prefer my version of events, though. Cause let’s be real: a gigantic Minion wreaking havoc in Ireland would be a great plot point in the third Despicable Me movie, which hits theaters June 2017.

How do you feel about minions taking over the world? Let us know in the comments below!

It's only fair to share...Share on Facebook
Facebook
Tweet about this on Twitter
Twitter
Share on Tumblr
Tumblr
Pin on Pinterest
Pinterest
Posted on Leave a comment

New Evidence Suggests Harington Will Return for Season 6 of ‘Thrones’

Unless you’ve been living under Casterly Rock, you know that Jon Snow was killed off in the Game of Thrones season 5 finale.

…Or was he?

Fans of the A Song of Ice and Fire book series and the HBO series have serious doubts about Snow’s death, and they’ve conjured up some pretty solid fan theories to explain how he could have survived his brutal assassination.

But we may now have some actual, non-conjectured proof that our favorite bastard will return for season 6 after all.

Kit Harington has been recently spotted in Belfast, Northern Ireland, where filming for season 6 of Game of Thrones is currently underway. He was first spotted at the airport in Belfast after disembarking his flight from London, a flight that fellow costar Tom Wlaschiha (Jaqen H’ghar) also was on (as reported by Watchers on the Wall).

https://twitter.com/WatchersOTWall/status/623481683103232000/photo/1

Harington was also sniped by The Daily Mail walking around Belfast a few days after he was spotted at the airport, this time with (former?) co star Ben Crompton (who you’ll know as Dolorous Edd, Snow’s Night’s Watch brother).

He’s covering up in a hoodie, but it’s clear that Harington is still rocking his gorgeous mane, which he was contractually obligated to not cut (Also, can we PLEASE talk about those skinny jeans?).

It could be that Harington is in Belfast simply filming scenes where he plays a dead body preparing for a good ol’ fashioned Night’s Watch burning, but if the fan theories do hold any merit (and we hope they do), Harington could be in Belfast for the long run.

But until George R.R Martin releases The Winds of Winter or Game of Thrones season 6 premieres (which will come first? we don’t know), the theories will remain just that… theories.

Do you think Jon Snow will be revived in season 6? Share your thoughts and theories below!

 

It's only fair to share...Share on Facebook
Facebook
Tweet about this on Twitter
Twitter
Share on Tumblr
Tumblr
Pin on Pinterest
Pinterest